How Your Car Defines You

By The Kenyan Bar Guy

Published on 23/11/2022

When you pump out loud music or sensibly rated music, you get attention. Everyone will notice you. As a guy that is sort of an achievement. It raises your social class, and you feel pretty good about it. But here is where the line is drawn, the car. Men for some reason need to have a certain caliber of cars to prove their worth. It does not matter if all the bells and whistles turn your jalopy into a spaceship. If the model is not recognized, then you too become invisible.

Now let’s talk about what owning a car means to you.

  1. Access to prestigious places

There are many places in this country where a matatu just won’t cut it. These are places that you cannot just treat like your home where you just pop in and put your feet up. These are places where when you show up the guy at the gate needs to feel like they would also do well with a car like yours before they even let you in. These are the guys that will probably ask you a million questions if they see that the machine you are driving is not up to standard. You will end up feeling like the song that refers to a doll is now really overrated and referenced to the slay queens.

  • The Women

Yes, they like pretty things like shoes and handbags. Also, the occasional flowers were delivered to their office. Let us not also forget the chocolates. But as a man, nothing really gives that seductive effect like a good ride. It helps if it is German or if it is big. All you need to do is just to say that you are going to drop them home and once they see the machine you might have to start having new ways of getting them out. While it might seem unconventional sometimes just borrow your friend’s Audi, hit the club, and cause a scene.

  • The road trips

You must admit it but there is nothing against the traditional “kadudu” but if you want to hit the road and give the experience of taking Instagram- worthy pictures you must level up. Everyone just wants to take pictures that will set their Instagram on fire and share a false façade of what their life is really like. You also want to pull up in the music you do not like just to draw attention impressing strangers that do not even care. Truth be told you can pull off that trip in a bug and still have the same fun.

  • The title

The owner of the car is always bestowed with different kinds of titles. You can be the captain, the chief, the boss, or even the “bazu”. It might seem menial, but these titles have a way of boosting your own self-esteem. You walk about knowing that people respect you or are expecting financial favors. But when you get behind the wheel all that dissipates into nothingness, and you just appreciate the fact that people recognize you. The only question hanging in the air right now is what name would you prefer?

  • The Convenience

It is a given you pull up a decent machine the price of anything goes up. But you also have the convenience of pulling up and asking for anything you want at any time of the day. Especially if it is at night and you are asking for the most random things like ENO and Postinor 2 they will always pay attention and get you what you need. You can also decide to dismiss the person you met last night and drop them off at the nearest boda boda stage just because the roads are just not what they used to be before. Take your pick.

So when you get there and pick your four-wheel machine I am wishing you all the best.

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